If you spit into the wind, it will hit you in the face. - Anonymous

The New York Times had a story today about ex-spouses blogging about their ex-spouses. Penelope Trunk was one of the bloggers interviewed. She was interviewed about her posts discussing her divorce and other personal issues. Her blog today points out that she feels she was misquoted in the article.

The article brings up a good point. When is it acceptable to write publicly about personal matters affecting those around you in a deep and personal way? When I was a young lawyer, a partner, having read one of my greatest pieces of legal writing, asked me to go for coffee. As we walked over, he pointed to a flashing electronic billboard and asked if I would agree to have what I had written about the other side and the trial court posted on the billboard. Sheepishly, I replied, "no." When I was going through a divorce, the judge had even better advice, "think again, before hitting send."

Blogs about divorce and ex-spouses range the gamut from Ex-husbands are stupid! to pieces designed by the author to offer solace for those going through similar experiences to outright vengeful ad hominem attacks of little value. I am not judging. Personally, if it is not something I want my daughters or my 86 year-old grandmother to read about, it is probably something I do not need to have the public reading.

If your building a business or if you are building a career, posting about your soon-to-be ex-spouse's proclivities will not help. It will not help your children either. In many instances and in many states, such actions are viewed as disparaging a parent - something family courts frown upon. Would you hire or go into business with someone that has presented a public image of being emotionally troubled, angry, and unable to let go?

The Internet and blogosphere as a forum is nothing more than a big flashing billboard. The vast majority of us are not professional writers, public icons, or so financially independent that personal revelations have no effect. Rather, the effect can be hurtful and financially damaging. Think again before hitting send.