QUICK – Somebody Talk Me Down Off the Ledge
I don't know if I should be angry or intrigued by the marketing ploy that was just pulled on my household. I can tell you that right now the overwhelming feeling is ANGER.
Yesterday in our mail was a handwritten envelope addressed to my husband – no return address – neighboring town cancel stamp.
Like every self-respecting wife would do in my place – I held it up to the light. Okay, maybe not every woman would admit that – I suppose I should be ashamed, but that isn't the point of my story. I didn't open the envelope but I could see there was a pink "While you were out" message slip in the envelope.
I put in on my husband's desk and then today when I was cleaning, I saw the pink message slip on the top of his pile.
Right there for anyone to read. So I read it. Here's what it said:
For: My husband
From: Martin Curry
Of: First Union Bank
RE: Your mortgage Please Call
I pay all the bills and so clearly this message was for me, but 1st Union doesn't hold our mortgage. When there is a question about the most important bill in your household – your home – it suddenly becomes your top priority, right?
So I called.
IT WAS A SALES CALL!!!!!!
Okay, I suppose it was clever. It got my attention. Right?
Trust me- it didn't get the attention Martin wanted and here's why.
The mortgage is in MY name. Was my name on the envelope? No. Was my name on the message?
NO.
Some chauvinistic-hoofed animal made an assumption that only the MAN needed to hear the sales offer.
Let me tell you something you should never assume – the wife isn't necessarily listed on the mortgage as a gesture. In our case, although my husband is a nice man, he is a librarian and if you think teachers are under paid – they've got nothing on librarians.
So the next time you want to send a marketing message from a listing that you purchase, make sure you use ALL OF THE NAMES and not just the first one or the male one.
Because if 1st Union offered me a 1% interest rate – I wouldn't listen. Okay, I'd listen, but right now that is what it will take to get my attention again.
So – help me down off the ledge. Am I totally off base? Okay, yes, maybe about holding the envelope up to the light – you've got me there – but I mean about totally leaving me off the marketing message. How hard would it have been to write Mr and Mrs?????
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By Ellen Weber, August 14, 2006 @ 5:15 am
Deborah, thanks for the interesting post and I am sorry about the note that came to your house from marketers. First the deception should bother us and then the exclusion!
When it comes to how the brain acts on language and uses its nuances… it is far higher than once thought. For that reason we need to turn “mankind” into “humankind” for all kinds of reasons as you suggest here and most would agree with you. The old way of doing language invites exclusion that’s subtle … and that holds us all back. What do you think?
By Deborah, August 14, 2006 @ 8:27 am
Ellen,
Good points. It may seem silly to turn mailman into mailperson or mail carrier, but you are right – there is an exclusion factor – frankly in my case, I don’t believe it was all that subtle. I’m still ticked just thinking about it!
By Tickets, September 28, 2007 @ 10:49 am
The chauvinistic way of informing you about the offer was evident. But I really do not understand why you were angry on that person. As long as we know that there are such people in the worlds, we have to accept the fact as a pain and simple act of living. Ignorance is the best allay in this little battle, but anger should be left out of the door.